Excerpts from my diary


I felt there is nobody anywhere. Just me and the images I have of others. It is impossible to have any connection with anyone because all we do is talk to ourselves and to the images in our head. That’s how thought runs our world. In this scheme of things, to have such a powerful and immersive connection with G, the way it happened and continues to be, is unfathomable to me. It is so rare and almost unbelievable, that an individual system is hooked to another system so powerfully that it is forced to loose its own conditioned bearings. Normally humans rarely truly connect. The exchanges are mostly limited to conditioned responses which are superficial in nature. There remains a sense of unfulfillment in every relationship. It is only a miracle of Mother Nature that can spark such a deep and total attraction towards an individual who has no investment in anything. Only Nature can engineer an encounter that burns to ashes all hopes, desires and ideals, to give an explosive taste of freedom to someone like me who always felt strangulated and burdened by thought.